Saturday, March 17, 2012

The Peyton Syndrome

I'll never forget the first time that I saw an ex girlfriend with her new boyfriend.
Even though I dumped her over the phone, even though we had some of the best times,
seeing her with some new guy made me feel
like I did in game 7 of the 2004 ALCS: freakin miserable.
(They destroyed us in yankee stadium, I'll never get over that!).

Now that Peyton Manning, arguably the third best quarterback from 1980 to now, behind Joe Montana and John Elway is definitively in the throws of free agency,
let the "seeing your ex with her new boyfriend", sports analogies begin!

Who could forget watching the greatest basketball player of all time
wither away in the District of Columbia. Winning 6 championships in a span of 8 years, the Houston Rockets can thank him personally for sitting out the 94, 95 seasons.
Jerry Krause, you should be ashamed of yourself for letting Michael jordan wear
any other jersey than a red, black and white # 23.
Championships: 0


One of the most emotional, trade press conferences of all time, Wayne Gretzky
won three Stanley cups with the edmonton oilers, only to be torn away by the Los Angeles Kings. Result: One Stanley Cup Final loss and brief stints in St. Louis and the New York Rangers.
Championships: 0


Joe Montana... Duke, I'll leave this one up to you.


Ahhh yes, the man they call johnny damon. You single handedly destroyed the New York yankees with 6 RBIS including a grand slam, putting us out of championship contention
for basically the next five years, only to be signed to the Yankees at the Red sox dismay and win a world series with the yankees in 2009.
Championships: 1


I will gladly admit to hating every dallas cowboys team that has ever suited up other than their
glory years of the early 1990's. even though my father raised me as a die hard new york
giants fan, you couldn't help but appreciate what those teams did with Super Bowls.
Emmit Smith Made running backs what they are today. Arian Foster, Ray Rice, that's
Emmit Smith right there.
Unfortunately Emmit just couldn't retire early enough, taking his talents to
the Arizona Cardinals.
Championships: 0


depending on how much of a man you are, you will handle seeing your ex girlfriend with her new boyfriend differently on all levels: either you sulk and cry yourself to sleep one night watching Lifetime Channel wondering why you dumped her, call her 800 times begging her to come back to you and eventually her father answers the phone and tells you he's going to shoot you if you call her again, you try to kick the new boyfriend's ass - only to get your ass kicked, or you persevere, ignore it and move on.
Which one are you?

here we are now. here is what we have all been waiting for. the million dollar question:
where will peyton play? reports say teams working Peyton out have walked away "very impressed" with his throwing ability.

Here are the Upperhands mock scenarios:

Denver Broncos
Perfect fit, but their schedule this year is absolutely brutal. Only way john elway can do what
we all have been hoping he'll do and get rid of Tim Tebow who isn't really that good yet.
John Elway will school Peyton and do anything he wants because he knows what quarterbacks need. My Upperhands pick of where I see the best fit. Came within a game of the Super Bowl last year, can defintely win now and into the future.


San Francisco 49ers
As much as it pains me to say it, this is really an amazing team if he goes to the West Coast. I don't believe that he would like to have to face Eli to go to the Super Bowl, so I don't think it will happen. Even though the 49ers picked up Randy Moss and are now talking to Mario Manningham and other receivers around the league. They obviously remember that the only receiver doing anything in the NFC Championship game was Vernon Davis, and he's a Tight end.
Championship is definitely possible now, unless they have to go through the New York Giants.



Tennessee Titans
Peyton Manning with Chris Johnson... enough said.


My guess is he will make his choice sometime in mid-week next week. Peace.

Special thanks to: Baker, duke getting blown up by lehigh (huge upset), andy pettite signing back with the yankees (roger clemens eat your heart out), rainy saturdays in los angeles, traktor scratch pro, ltj bukem, respect thursdays, tall boy pbrs.

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